I’ve Had Bad Experiences
I was discussing earlier in the week with my brother about our friend who’s married and how his wife won’t let him go to my brother’s bachelor party because she’s afraid that he might cheat. The excuse our friend gave my brother was, “I’ve had bad experiences in the past,” and it struck me that that is a very weak excuse for controlling your partner. Okay, we’ve all had bad experiences that we don’t wish to revisit–I get that, but are you really going to use that as the basis for your future with someone?
To me this seems like a very easy get out of jail free card. You’re not ‘controlling’ you’re just ‘guarded’ and ‘cautious’ so therefore you won’t let your partner live their life or see friends. Or dress a certain way or…whatever. It’s an excuse and like most excuses it does have a basis of truth yet it ultimately is an excuse and usually not a good one. Fear of cheating is natural. Fear of having your significant other cheat and therefore neutering him is not.