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Maybe An Imagination Is Dangerous

May 28, 2007

I’ve been thinking…
Mostly about the nature of the human experience and what makes us what we are. I think it’s our imagination that makes us the most dangerous thing on this planet. Nothing anything can ever do to us can possibly be worse than our imagination can think up. We terrorize ourselves most of the time with such trivialities, no wonder we can think up new ways to screw a person up.

I’ve been experiencing this lately, a bit. Call it crazy or not, but imagination can be the best thing to have or the worst. It depends on how you use it and I usually think negatively about myself, about situations I’m in and people I interact with. This is not to say I think friends are bloody bastards or that I think they’re monsters–no, I tend to think they’ll all leave one day. Or that they’ll get bored with me and then leave. Or any other number of possibilities; it’s really sick sometimes. I would think this would be motivation to take chances, yet something always holds me back. I mean, think of it this way, anything anyone could ever do could never compare to anything I could ever do to myself. I think. Short of death, maybe.

Any way, my point is that maybe imagination really is dangerous but it’s the danger that keeps it going. If we didn’t have it then we’d be dull, humans probably wouldn’t think of new ways to hurt each other, but we’d be dull. I’m rather ambivalent on it these days. I wish I didn’t have it because of the emotions it brings out in me, but I also want it because I wouldn’t be who I am without it.

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