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Book Shelves And Fantasyland

March 6, 2013

I was thinking of my book shelf, the one that’s currently being used as storage in the garage, and how when it was active what I was reading. I would buy fantasy novels like Terry Pratchett’s Discworld novels or StarWars expanded universe. I very rarely bought a piece of fiction set in the real world. Mostly for that I’d go to Nick Hornby novels because he tended to write about losers in life eventually succeeding, A Long Way Down was particularly poignant at the end for me. They succeeded in not killing themselves, but what now?

I liked those stories, but I was thinking last night about what it said about; do I prefer to live away from reality? Or is it just a preference? Psychology often teaches us that every thing that we do can be analyzed for how we think so maybe that’s the reason for the questioning? Seems silly to point to book preference as a window into the mind, but maybe it’s true? I mean, I certainly have a very limited genre base.

Now I’ve been buying books more based in reality and less in fantasy so does that mean that I’m suddenly trying to exist in reality? Again, this is all pretty silly to think about, but if book genres do appeal to certain types then maybe it really was portentous of things to come for me, because I certainly was steadily pushed back into a box because of the depression, anxiety, and panic attacks to a place where sci-fi and fantasy was generally more appealing than my present reality.

I’m also buying more educational books about the mind and the body and how things work internally like You Are Not So Smart and of course, Daring Greatly. However, I think the latter will be more beneficial to me than the former. Still, I think it points to a trend of gradually escaping this prison or box I put myself in. And hopefully becoming more open to possibilities. Now I need to start putting these thoughts to action, fortunately warmer weather is on the way.

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