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I Return

April 2, 2013

Yes it is I, big as life and twice as ugly! Last week was an emotional wreck for me. I was lonely, exhausted, and I was being uptight with someone (she who shall remain nameless) when I shouldn’t have been. We came to an understanding yesterday which was very good because unlike some of the people I call my ‘friend’ I really do value her as a friend and after last night (yay hypberole!) I think she is really an amazing person and I’m glad I know her. So I’m thankful we’re cool.

Other than that I’ve been very lonely. I’ve been craving any kind of intimate contact with anyone whether it be physical or mental I just…need it. Every night I get this restless feeling I get this image in my head of myself beating my head against a brick wall. Kind of symbolic for me considering that’s how I feel on those nights because there’s nobody (and I’ve checked) who’s going to hang out, chill, text, or call. NOBODY.

So I need to get my ass in gear or it’s going to be head-smashing times infinite for me. I’ve also found that I…I really do not like Pennsylvania. It’s so spread out and if you’re a quasi-agoraphobe it’s painful. You have to drive 18 miles to the nearest piece of civilization, shit’s closed on days it would be open anywhere civilized, and I just don’t like it. The place feels too isolating for me which isn’t a good thing when you’re already pretty isolated mentally. And that’s really my entire piece tonight. Clocking in at an impressive 289 words! I promise I’ll be updating more frequently…not that I know if anyone reads this thing. Who knows, someone might. Amiright?

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