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Coooookie!

July 17, 2013

I’m rather…disturbed by the current trend of ads ‘following’ me from site to site. I’m sure I’m not the only one disturbed by this trend–which is why I have adblock-plus on full alert these days as a result. Actually, I always have it on full alert on my computer, but my browsing on my iPad’s a nightmare. Look, I’m fine if you depend on ad revenue for your site, but if I accidentally click on Grown-up Diapers Unlimited, I don’t want that shit following me around like a goddamn STD.

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The current ad-based STD I accidentally clicked on.

Which brings me to my ever-current problem with being online: the over-commercialization of what was once relatively ad-free. Or at least that’s how I’m remembering it from my 1996 brained self. I really don’t remember too many websites being inundated with ads for….anything. Sure, some sites had them, but generally it seemed I had to go out of my way to see a web ad. Now they’re everywhere. And I don’t want to be advertised every second of every day.

It’s like a person would have to go to sleep to avoid seeing an advert and who knows, you might see one even in your dreams and don’t realize it. After all the average person has fifteen dreams per night. At least one of them has to include an ad for that really awesome penis extender that you just have to have. So, unless you live in a cabin in the woods, are a nomad in the Middle East, or live in a jungle, chances are you’re going to be advertised to at all hours of the day and possibly in your sleep.

Just imagine what could happen if the government ever figures out how to make a message short and sweet and repeat it every day. Fortunately all of their announcements are long, tedious, and make me want to stab things. But oh, Rush Limbaugh and other conservatives try–especially on twitter with their oh so funny tweets.

Ahem…tangent over, I used to support these indie websites that, ‘totally need ad revenue to survive,’ well you know what? Fuck you. Fuck you with a big spiked dildo. If your ads are going to be following me around like some creepy stalker because I had the temerity to accidentally click one of your ads that you so desperately need to survive, then die. Okay? Just fold up shop, because I don’t want to be stalked by your advertisers. I refuse to subject myself to that kind of ad revenue program that tries to cater to me, but really just annoys the ever loving shit out of me.

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