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This Is Going To Be So Meta (Or Not)

August 22, 2013

I’ve had a bit of a quandary lately with regards to how much I update vs. the people who follow my blagh and oddly, I do have an audience now. The first time I had a real torrent of people keeping tabs on my blagh I had an amused take on it: I thought that it was a goof. Who really wants to read this stuff? Then as more people started following I was rather impressed.

After that I became rather self-conscious about the whole thing. True, my audience is not in the hundreds of thousands like some, but it is a rather…strange feeling to go from mostly anonymity on here to actually being read and followed. So the thoughts start creeping in: ‘To what, if any, responsibility do I owe the people who read this thing to update.’ There is no manual on web logging–or I should say, consistent manual. Everyone you ask about this topic will likely give a different answer.

It’s really a tough situation to be in with something like this. I like updating and I like sharing my thoughts and trivialities, this blagh is an escape valve. I can let off steam and post whatever the hell’s bugging me any day. But now people are reading and I’m over-thinking and I’ve been rather complacent with updating and…breathe. Honestly I don’t owe any of you anything. That sounds incredibly rude the way I just typed it, but I don’t. However, my sense of duty to others mandates that I at least have one freak-out per day about how I’m not updating as much.

So it’s an interesting line to straddle and one I’m still figuring out. I think when I was updating fairly regularly I was having fun with it, but after a while my thoughts just dried up so much that they turned to kindling. I think that’s also what happened to my mental state that sent me in to such a tailspin originally. Therefore I will update. Just not every day and maybe not even every week.

I think oughts needs to be nourished and replenished and just updating so much dries you up inside. Thank you for indulging me and bothering to read. If

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