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Squirrel Urine And You

December 10, 2014

Now, we’ve all reached that point in life where we’re thinking, “My car really needs a good cleaning, but I want to be environmentally conscious about it.” Well…have I got the solution for you: squirrel urine. See, what the doctors at Von Lichtenberg university have been studying is the cleaning power of urine and they’ve found that squirrels produce the best urine for cleaning your car–inside and out! It sounds too amazing to be true, but basically what you need to do is find a squirrel and give them lots of water and bam! Free cleaner. See, it’s the natural enzymes in the liquid that clean the best.

Don’t believe me? Let’s ask this hobo on the street what he thought about the power of urine:

“Ohh…yes, I’ve cleaned with urine for some years now. It also makes a dandy toothpaste.”

See that ladies and gentlemen? It even works as a hygienic toothpaste. What’s not to love?

For three easy payments of $19.95 you too can have this transformative gift. Included are:

  • Five micofiber high intensity brushes.
  • 6 intensity dense gloves for catching the squirrels
  • And 62 3oz containers.

That’s a steal! And order now and you’ll receive 62 more 3oz containers with special overflow lid. Wow! What a bargain! I can’t wait to hear from you. Just dial 1-888-328-7877. Operators will be standing by. If you reach a sex line, you’ve dialed too far.

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