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June 30, 2015

So…I may have left stretchy short hell, but damn…my pants still feel like a boa constrictor is trying to squeeze me to death. Ow. Now I know what people in the 70’s went through with extra-tight pants. Yow…At any rate, today’s been a good day. I went to therapy and managed to drive alone without anxiety and I took a run at two grocery stores again and succeeded with no anxiety. My therapy session was basically one bullshitting session, which in my therapist’s words, “The less you talk about anxiety the more I know it’s no bothering you,” so that’s good. I guess I just need to start believing in myself more–which I am. I’m having less reasons to doubt that I can overcome this shadow that’s hung over me for 7/8 years.

It’s just a shame it wiped out the latter half of my 20’s and I can never get that time back. Ah well, I feel more confident now than I did then. Soo…it’s not a total wash. My birthday’s next week and I turn 33 and I’m determined not to make my 33rd year as horrible as my 32nd became. Oh, and today was Glornax-7’s birthday today. Happy birthday to you! You’ll probably never read this ever, but still…I do care about her and I did tell her tonight that I’m not giving up on her as a friend. I only gave up on one person and that was me and I’m not doing that again.

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