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Hey Hey It’s The Thirties

August 4, 2015

Okay…more like the age. Not the era. Because the thirties are long gone, but you could kind of make the case that we’re sort of reliving them. Or at least the roaring 20’s. Anyway, I want to talk about age. I see it every day from my friends–especially my female friends that are in the last years of their 20’s. They recoil and shriek in horror at being 30, but really…it’s not too bad.

In fact, I’m enjoying my 30’s much more than I enjoyed my 20’s. I feel less awkward, more confident, more determined, and just all around better than in my 20’s.

Body issues

I have a lot of them. In fact, for the longest time the most you’d see of my body are scant photos where I’m in the background or hiding away from them. It was like I was bigfoot and the hunters were after me and you’d only see grainy, blurry shots of me. Now I’m much more okay with taking a body shot of myself. The weight loss has even helped with that feeling. Oh and I fucking smile more. You’d see older photos of me where I’m barely smiling at all, but not now. Now I’m okay with smiling. As my friend says: I tend to smile with my eyes as well. Sooo…yeah, being in my 30’s helped cure me of that. The change wasn’t overnight, but gradually I became more assured in it.

‘Give a shit’

One added benefit of being in your 30’s, for me anyway, is that I care much less than I did when I was in my 20’s. I don’t care if what I’m wearing is cool. Or if what I’m doing is being done correctly. Oh, sure, if I ran a press or worked on cars, or heavy machinery I’d totally care. But art? Writing? Fuck that. I don’t care if it’s being done ‘the right way’ because with these things there is no ‘right way’. Only that you’re doing it. And for clothes? Well, you see how I feel about that topic. I will admit that I do still have moments where I am that way, but they’re becoming very few and they’re only brief moments.

Confidence

Along with not giving too much of a shit, you also have more confidence when you don’t give a shit. I’m sure there’s people in their 20’s now that feel this way, but it took me till my 30’s to actually grasp that concept and now that I have I’m never letting go! I will love him and pet him and squeeze him and name him George. I’ve also learned that in my case it’s not so easy to muster up the confidence if you let it go. One slip up and my world comes crashing. Probably because it’s still very new to me and fragile. Like armor that you’re just breaking in. But so far, so good.

And finally: March to your own beat

If you’re like me and you constantly have this fear of doing everything wrong, very little confidence, being insecure about your body/clothing/hair/teeth/birthday cake etc. You don’t march to your own beat. You march to someone else’s. In my case I was marching to my best friend’s and while it did help for awhile, I knew there were limits that even following him couldn’t cure. I had to work that shit out on my own. And I have! Mostly. I don’t listen to many music nazis anymore or really anyone that’s trying to influence me into following a trend. I also like who I am and accept my quirks and foibles and either work on them when they don’t benefit me or keep them. Soo…yeah…being in your 30’s isn’t so bad.

I have no idea what everyone’s afraid of when they turn 30. True there is that thought, “One step closer to death,” but it doesn’t have to be that way. You can accept aging and getting older and learn new things about yourself or kill the old things about yourself that aren’t working for you. And that to me is why I kind of find this recoiling in horror from my friends more than a little amusing. True, you will get to that point where you look at the youth and ask yourself, “Were we ever that dumb?” And the answer is always…kinda. I think it’s just easier to point out the idiocy of today’s youth than when we were younger.

That ease of information makes teenagers and people in their 20’s seem really dumb or dumber than they are. Oh, sure, with the today’s social justice crowd and the easily offended crowd which do combine into a Voltron of suck, they make our world worse. But overall I think idiocy is easier to broadcast. Or I can pat you on the ass and say, “No, we were never that dumb.” Which is really the truth.

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